Sunday, March 20, 2016

Spring Cleaning: Ending Toxic Relationships


   I'm a firm believer that people come into your life for a reason a season or a lifetime. This being the first day of spring I usually like to do spring cleaning not just for the house but for my life. Cleaning is good for the soul however I may not have to do as much cleaning as I originally thought I did. You see as I get older it’s easier and quicker to spot the who and what that need to be cleared away. In the past I’ve often dragged my feet when I felt I didn’t want someone in my life any longer. Then when I did end the relationship I usually went back thinking we just needed time apart only to find that nothing had changed.

   This time around the relationships I thought would hurt to end or cause some kind of sting or emotional backlash actually didn't because sometimes it's harder being a person's friend or harder being in a relationship with them then it is letting go of them. Now I don't just immediately start cutting people out of my life or cutting people off I give them chances but you can only give so many chances before it becomes a toxic relationship.

   A toxic relationship can be any type of relationship. It doesn't have to be romantic. A toxic relationship can be with anyone. It can be a family member, a friend, a co-worker, neighbor or a spouse. It’s just that a spouse is usually the most common form of a toxic relationship but like I said that's not always the case. We all need people in our lives to care for and to care about us but a lot of the time those relationships can be one-sided.

   If you're in a relationship where you feel like you're doing all the work, all the communicating, all the talking, all the time that can be a toxic relationship. If you're in a relationship where you're the one doing all the texting, calling and emailing then you deserve better. You deserve to be with someone that thinks about you. Someone that reaches out to instead of you doing it all the time. Remember a healthy relationship is 50/50 but there are times when you need to give a little more and that’s ok. Sometimes the other person may be going through something and they need more from you than they can give.

   It's good to think about any good times that you may have had together but if you haven't had any good times in a very long while that may mean it's time to move on. If you have someone that's always lying to you or putting others before you move on don't feel bad about it just let them go. Most relationships tend to run their course eventually. Sometimes they last a long time other times they don't but what I realized is sometimes in a relationship I felt that I met the person because I needed them in my life at that time but it really turned out that they needed me and then once their need for me was over it was time to move on. Spring cleaning can be good for the soul everyone needs to do it from time to time it doesn't even have to be spring but right now I feel like I'm at a point in my life where this is the perfect time for me to do some deep cleaning.

2 comments:

  1. That is one thing I have learned as I get older.. good friends are worth treating well and I just dont have time for people who suck. haha

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